Voice of a single mother

I am sorry but you weren't there to fight for me when people pelted stones at me, called me a whore, bitch, a skank and slut !
But you should have been there.

I am sorry but you weren't there to support my parents when people mocked them for raising a shameless daughter like me.
But you should have been there.

I am sorry but you weren't there when the mark of our love was growing inside me.
But you should have been there.

I am sorry but you weren't there to hear the first cry of our princess when she entered this world.
But you should have been there.

I am sorry but you weren't there to sing a lullaby to our baby when she used to cry all night.
But you should have been there.

I am sorry but you weren't there to hold our princess' hand when she used to trip and fall as she learnt to walk.
But you should have been there.

I am sorry but you weren't there to wish her "happy birthday" when she turned one.
But you should have been there.

I am sorry but you weren't there when people questioned me about my marriage and the father of my daughter.
But you should have been there.

I am sorry but you weren't there to protect our princess when the entire world humiliated her by calling her an "illegitimate".
But you should have been there.

I am sorry to say that you will always be my princess' father but you will never be her super hero.

I am sorry to say that you will always be my first love but you will never be the man who I lost my heart to.

Dedicating this to the most fearless woman I've ever met !!

Daughter of Iraq

Mayada Al Askari, a divorced mother of two, was leading a simple life managing a business that involved printing brochures. Her life gets capsized when she is falsely accused of printing anti-government propaganda. Despite having no idea of what her crime was, she lands up in cell 52 of Baladiyat prison. She meets women from all walks of life who shared the same fate of imprisonment, torture and had been condemned guilty without a trial. Nothing they said or did made a difference. 

Mayada led a comparatively comfortable life in Iraq because her family had ensured that she was educated and independent. Her mother was quite a powerful person in Iraq until she decided to move to Amman. Mayada had also come in contact with Saddam Hussein during the early times of his political career and he had even admired the articles she wrote when she was a journalist. However, nothing prepared her for life in Iraq’s so called "concentration camps". She encounters Samara, a strong, selfless and loving woman whose story would open up your tear glands :)

The women spent their time in jail talking about their stories and the way in which they ended up in the boot camp. They loved to hear about Mayada’s life story and her tales about the famous people she had met and Saddam Hussein and his wife were of particular interest. 

Most of the "Shadow Women" had no idea of what wrong they had done to land in jail. Only after repeated torture did they realize what was assumed to be their crime. The most distressing part was that their families had no idea of what happened to them because they weren't given a chance to call or let anybody know.  Despite all the torment and torture, the caring and concerned nature of her fellow inmates touched Mayada. 

The sufferings of Mayada, Samara and other “shadow women” in cell 52 is unimaginable and their will power to survive is something that has to be lauded. Hit continuously with a whip, beaten up, burned, electrocuted, raped and what not....I could hardly believe that they managed to survive for months....

I wasn't able to get done with this book in a single go for the story induced a queasy feel in me..... I quivered in horror at the description of their sufferings but was also touched by the compassion they held for eachother.

Even after her release, life wasn't smooth for Mayada for she not only bore the physical scars of her torture sessions but also hoarded memories that her mind simply couldn't get rid of.....Mayada found her way out of prison (thanks to the connections her mother had) but what about the other shadow women who were in cell 52 ???
Did they get killed by Sadam's monsters or they managed to save their lives ??? Mayada herself doesnt have a clue of what happened to them.........The desperation to know if your loved ones are alive is worse than death itself !!!!

The world is a vicious place for innocent people wanting to live with family and friends. All they want is happiness :)

Is that too much to ask for ?

Life lessons

Try not to think

What makes your heart sink,

Try not to drink

Post a sesh with the shrink,

Try not to stay confined during the day

Because of what people say,

Try not to stay

Pave yourself a way,

Try not to sleep

After making someone weep,

Try not to feel

The pain before you heal,

Above all,

Try not to be

Someone the world wants to see.

Devdasi system

Hello again!

I’m back here and I honestly haven't gotten the right time and headspace to get back to writing, but something kept nudging me to write about this tonight. And so, here I am, with a cup of coffee at 11PM, penning down my piled-up thoughts.

Flesh trade masked under the veil of Devdasi system is an abhorrent and shameful practice that is followed in our country.  It is nothing but yet another crime that is sanctioned under the name of religion and tradition. Devdasi system is an age-old custom where in a young girl is married to a deity even before she attains puberty. They were forbidden from a real marriage and had to devote their life rendering service to gods. They were considered to be the reincarnation of courtesans in Indra's court and the presence of a devdasi in occasions was considered auspicious because she was considered to be a nithya sumangali (a woman who is forever free from widowhood). But later on, devdasi system became the reason for the existence of modern day prostitution.

Devdasi system was abolished in the 1880s, thanks to the efforts of Dr.Muthulakshmi Reddy but it is still prevalent in various parts of India. Even to this day, it is common in the Eastern part of india where in parents marry off their daughters to deities to avoid giving dowry.
Factors like caste system, male domination and economic stress resulted in them becoming prostitutes. Some devdasis are too young to even figure out what is happening to them and nothing can be more painful than getting kicked out by your own parents. They are not allowed to marry anybody else and are not supposed to step foot out of the temple. In the morning, they spend their time cleaning the temple and sanctum, decorating the shrines, dancing, singing and pleading to gods to put an end to their never-ending sufferings. During the nights, they are forced to transform into prostitutes to quench the thirst of priests, upper caste and high profile men. The daughter of a devdasi becomes a devdasi again and the tradition keeps going on and on. They face discrimination on the basis of caste, suffer from poverty, mental trauma and even become victims of HIV.

Women caught in this system are deprived of basic freedom and opportunities, enduring significant social stigma and economic instability. If only there is a way to eradicate this practice in regions where it is still prevalent and support these women in reclaiming their rights and dignity :)

She was forced into flesh trade,
Her innocence stolen, 
Dreams betrayed,
Wanted the practice to be slayed,
But found her hopes fade,
For the ones who preyed,
Never let it bade.